The quiet art of helping someone talk themselves into change — instead of doing it for them. Picture the most pointless argument you’ve ever been in. You know the one. You know you’re right. You have the facts, the evidence, the receipts. And the more airtight your case gets, the harder the other person digs … Read More
Why understanding how you learn might change how you get sober — and stay that way. Here’s something nobody talks about enough in addiction treatment: we spend an enormous amount of time telling people what they need to learn, and almost no time figuring out how they actually learn. We put twenty people in a … Read More
You Drank for a Reason If you’re anything like me, you assumed the drink was the problem. Remove the drink, remove the problem. Simple. Absolute nonsense. The drink was doing a job. For me it handled relaxing, confidence and socializing. (It never did get around to my taxes.) Take the drink away and the job … Read More
What two dead philosophers figured out about addiction 2,300 years before the first meeting Here’s a sentence that will annoy about half of you: your recovery is not primarily about stopping something. I know. I know what it feels like at day three. It feels like the entire universe has collapsed into a single act … Read More
Location 10 · Living It — where a new leader stands at the river with his mentor gone and the whole country waiting, a tinker in a jail cell maps a pilgrim who must not lose his scroll, and a pastor names the one thing an instant world can’t give you: a long obedience A … Read More
Let’s start with the part nobody puts on the brochure: you can put together ten good months (program, meetings, counseling, the whole thing) and then walk past one particular corner at two in the afternoon, stone cold clean, and feel your whole body turn toward it. Not a thought. Not a decision. A turn. That’s … Read More